Halloween Past

Everything changes and evolves.  Halloween not-with-standing.  It has grown into a huge industry in The United States.  There are entire holiday stores that are devoted to costumes and decorations.  People put up orange and black lights outside on the same trees that will sport Christmas colors in a few weeks.  You can find an outfit and makeup that will transform you into most anything at all with little effort.  Some things are constant, of course.  Many kids still go from door to door collecting candy and other goodies.  Mostly minature candy bars nowadays.  Streets fill up with ghosts and monsters.  There are still tricks that are played.  Everyone but old grouches and those who are offended by some religious perspective or supposed evil seem to have a great time.  Halloween is still fun.  Different but plenty of fun.

I grew up in a different age.  There was little commercial value in Halloween except for an increase in candy sales I'm sure.  Masks were available at some places along with a few costumes.  None of them were very elaborate.  Most of us had mothers or grandmothers who made our outfits for Trick or Treating.  We had to decide well in advance what we were going to be and wear on Halloween.  Othewise it just turned out to be a white sheet with holes cut out for eyes, nose and mouth.  There were never any bags or carriers for the collection of goodies.  Most of us had grocery bags that we decorated at school or at home.  They had cut out handles or ones that had been pasted on the top for easy carrying.  My wife reminded me that rainy days resulted in busted bags with spoiled candy.  Sometimes we would make extra trips home to deposit our loot so that it wouldn't break the bags.  There was always some mean adult who would drop a big apple in the sack and split it open.  Great party ideas included bobbing for apples in a tub of water.

Anyone who did not have treats or who made the mistake of not being at home on Halloween was subject to Tricks.  Lots of these would result in juvenile probation and in today's world despite the fact that they were pretty much harmless.  We soaped windows, flung toilet paper in the trees and every now and then set a bag of poop on fire at someone's doorstep.  Schools were always a target.  Egging was reserved for another level of trickster.  We were told that raw eggs destroyed the paint on cars and that only hoodlums did such things.  For some reason that stopped me.  Not sure why.  Tricking was great entertainment and geneally accepted by the community at large.

All-in-all the results of Halloween were the same in the 1950's and 60's as they are now.  Sugar highs turn into headaches and stomach aches.  Parents end up taking much of the candy into their possession to stop future gorging and overdose.  All of the costumes and stuff get stored away.  Messes get cleaned up.  It is a terrific holiday.  Happy Halloween!

Being Lost

The experience of being lost is bewildering and often frightening. We find ourselves in an unfamiliar place without a good frame of reference. There is an overwhelming desire to get information and regain our bearings. Fear can intensify to such a point that even the directional cues such as the position of the sun are confusing. You wander so far off the path that you have no idea where you might be. The fear and disorientation turns into panic. We pray that someone will find us.

There is seldom a time that being lost is a pleasant experience for most of us. Some people, however, seem to relish the whole thing. My Uncle Bob and my Dad were two of those people. They loved to “take the scenic route” and were delighted when the adventure resulted in getting (what seemed to be) hopelessly lost. The announcement from the front seat of the car that we were veering off to the road less traveled was not usually well received. Highways become two lane roads which ultimately led to dirt roads in the country, one lane mountain byways and remote villages that no stranger had visited for several million years. These guys were undeterred by protests from helpless wives and children. Their enthusiasm only became greater as we dropped deeper into the abyss. Dad and Uncle Bob did not believe that there was any such thing as being lost. We always found our way back home or to our ultimate destination. We were never eaten by wild animals or froze and starved to death in our cars. They taught us a really valuable life lesson. Being lost is a state of mind. It is one that my cousins and I have assimilated pretty well.

There is so much to learn and so much to see. We can take the safe road and move from destination to destination if we want. The problem is that we miss all of the really great things that are off the beaten path. Life deals us plenty of blows. We are often windswept and thrown off course. We can choose to be lost and helpless or we can embrace the experience and dive into the excitement of the “scenic route”. I recommend this one that is just to the left and seems to go…let’s see…I thought I knew.

The Next Right Thing

We are charged, in life, with the task of doing “the next right thing”. This implies that there is absolutely nothing that can be done to change the past. There is also nothing that we can do which will generate guaranteed outcomes in the future. It is vitally important to focus on the here and now. This is the time to assess our position, utilize the tools at hand, and move forward with meaningful action and good intentions.

Doing the right thing has three basic component parts:

1. Don’t worry. All that will come of it is an increasing inability to do anything at all. Worry will certainly negatively impact your physical and emotional health.


2. Don’t hurry. Hasty action will rarely achieve good results and might have dire consequences. Take some time, consider the impact of what is about to be done.


3. Don’t hate. The one that is most impacted by hate is the one who is doing the hating. There is no reason to foster this feeling. Hating people, places, or situations only creates deep resentment. Resentment steals the spotlight and hinders the capacity to focus on anything but the negative.

We can be in charge of the present decisions that we are making. We can control our part in every response and reaction. We can do the next right thing.

The Divine Mirror

The quest for understanding our own lives absolutely involves getting to know other people. We cannot develop true discernment without self exploration through the mirror offered by others. This has been called "the Divine Mirror". When looking deeply into it we see all of our beauty and blemishes. We see other people through the filter of self. We might even begin to glimpse the delight that is envisioned by the Creator of it all.

There is great wisdom in the old adage about walking a mile in the shoes of another person. We can never know the life-long effect of the trials and troubles endured by fellow human beings. All we get to see is the snapshot of the momentary encounters that we have. This never offers much depth of experience. We often offer knee jerk reactions and over-reactions in response to annoyances caused by such meetings. Sometimes the exchanges can be unpleasant and troubling.

We always have the opportunity to stop, hesitate and consider prior to taking action. Mentally holding up a mirror to envision our reactions will almost always elicit a different answer to encounters with people. We are able to see ourselves and our actions through the eyes of others. We take the opportunity to envision more than the behavior that is upsetting. A different person is revealed as we look more deeply than the present moment. My own practice is to see each person as a child. It is much harder to be judgmental with a nine year old than with an adult. Try taking the time to look more deeply. The experience will enhance and provide a better understanding of life.

Bestowing Blessings

Abraham Blessing Isaac by Govert Flinck

Blessings are always in short supply! There are never enough occasions in which we bestow this profound and magnificent infusion of hope, good will and sacred expression. It is surprising that we do not offer more of them to each other. They are powerful ways to confirm love and approval. They change the landscape of our circumstances at the time. People listen to them with care. We certainly offer curses readily enough.

This is my very favorite Gaelic Blessing. It was given to me by my Aunt Lucille and hangs in our home to this day. It is familiar to many people:

"May the road rise up to meet you.
May the wind be always at your back.
May the sun shine warm upon your face;
the rains fall soft upon your fields
and until we meet again,
may God hold you in the palm of His hand."

There is a story about a priest who was blessing members of his congregation. He asked anyone who wanted to receive the special blessing to come to the front of the church. A mentally challenged man came forward. The priest, Henri Nouwen, made the sign of the cross on his forehead and said some words. The man said, “That’s no blessing” and wrapped his arms around the priest. Henri responded by wrapping his own arms around the man telling him of his special place in his heart and in the community. When he looked up from his friend he saw that the entire congregation had lined up for their personal rich blessing.

We need to take the opportunity to bestow and offer blessings. The Hawaiians do it with everything that is new on the islands. The Irish are masters of the celebration of blessing. It is just a matter of speaking your well wishes from the heart. Memorize some or just make them up. Everyone is hungry for them.

The Purpose of Heroes

Most of us have easily identified a personal hero at some time in our lives. We have admired figures in history, politics, celebrities, mythical icons and even comic book characters. Their magnificent behavior thrilled us and set our imagination on fire. We could imagine ourselves doing such things. Some of us played games as children that allowed us to actually become the hero of our fantasies. It is unfortunate that most of us drop our champions as we grow older.

Tarnished images of the human beings that we admired and impossible super powers of fictitious characters lead us to a vision of a more mundane existence. We learn to accept our limitations and see the flaws of those who rise to great heights. Reality sets in. It is easy to become skeptical and suspicious in a world of investigative reporting and instant news. The luster and sparkle of life become murky. Hero worship can rarely have a good end. There will almost always be a fall from grace. It does not have to be that way.

The qualities and behaviors that we admired in the champion are enduring and meaningful. I used to conduct a regular workshop on the hero at Bridgeway in Brevard, NC. The patients at the facility had given up on life in many ways. It was important for them to regain a sense of possibilities. Participants identified heroes from childhood and later life, both mythical and historic. We laughed and reminisced about them all. Then we erased the names of the champions and replaced them with character traits. We talked about our real opportunities to rise to such heights and behave in valiant ways. We may not be able to leap tall buildings in a single bound, but we can step in to stop a bully. We may not be able to see through a wall to find a missing treasure, but we can provide wisdom for those in need. We can be heroic. All we have to do is envision the great deeds of others and rise to the occasion. Now is the time. The world is waiting for us.