Easter and Passover remind us that we have the incredible opportunity to begin again with each sunrise. The things that did not turn out well, disappointments, tragedies and troubles of yesterday have vanished into thin air. The new beginning is here and now. How can we ever imagine the amazing things that might happen if we fully participate in the process of today as it unfolds? We drop the idea of expectations and adopt an attitude of gratitude. Of course good things will happen and some tough ones too. The outcomes are determined by our positive thinking and resolution of beginning anew.
Walter Winchel once said that we should: "Remember today, for it is the beginning of always. Today marks the start of a brave new future filled with all your dreams can hold. Think truly to the future and make those dreams come true.” We give up on dreams too easily. They take a back seat to the daily grind of obligations. I once had a young patient who was struggling with very painful issues of abuse and addiction. He was only 14. The gritty determination to be well that he had was inspiring. At the close of his treatment he was on the road to real healing. His mother asked for a few moments after his last session. She thanked me for all of the help and began to weep. What would become of her when Shane graduated from high school in a few years and she was left alone? Her whole life had been dedicated, as a single Mom, to raising her only child. Her dreams of becoming an attorney had dissolved along with her marriage years ago. I asked her a simple question. What would it take to start studying to be a lawyer right now? She was dumbfounded. That was a ridiculous question. She could only possibly work in one class a semester (and that would be damn hard). It would take ten years at least. I asked another question followed by a statement. What will happen if you don't do it? In ten years you will be alone, working at a job that you hate. Or you can be a lawyer in ten years. The choice is yours. She looked at me strangely, thanked me, and left.
I was living in the mountains of North Carolina three years after that conversation in Champaign, Illinois with Shane and his mother. I got a phone call one evening and it was Shane. He was bubbling over with news that he had just graduated from high school. I congratulated him and told him how proud I was. We talked for a few minutes and he asked if I would like to say hello to his Mom. I agreed and he put her on the phone. We were both thrilled for her boy. Then she told me her own great story. She had pursued the idea that we had talked about three years ago and things had gone well. Very well. Her announcement floored me. She was going to sit for the Illinois Bar that summer. Her dreams had come true. Her positive spin on 'can do and will do' had changed her life.
The next time we face a difficulty we have a chance to wrestle with a ‘can do and will do’ state of mind. We ‘can and will’ improve our situation rather than agonize over it. We ‘can and will’ have the life that we have dreamed of having. The only thing that can stop us is giving in and giving up.
