Most of us long for a "new awakening" in out lives, a transformation from who we are to who we dream of being. But what kind of action is needed in order to achieve such change? There are so many self improvement books and articles on the subject that one could almost spend a lifetime reading and studying. The list of seminars and speakers, internet blogs and sites go on and on. The truth is that these epiphanies are elusive. They seem to come to people at unlikely times.
Bill Wilson, a co-founder of Alcoholics Anonymous, was incarcerated for the fourth time at Manhattan's Towns Hospital in 1934. He tells of a spiritual awakening, a flash of white light, a liberating awareness of God. This experience led to the founding of AA and the gift of 12 Step Recovery. He was sedated, detoxified and hopeless. Bill prayed, "If there be a God, will He show himself?" He said this of his life altering experience. The result was instant, electric, beyond description. The place seemed to light up, blinding white. I knew only ecstasy and seemed on a mountain. A great wind blew, enveloping and penetrating me. To me, it was not of air, but of Spirit. Blazing, there came the tremendous thought. 'You are a free man.' Then the ecstasy subsided. I found myself in a new world of consciousness which was suffused by a Presence. One with the Universe, a great peace stole over me."
Thomas Merton, the great writer and spiritual mentor, was at a point of complete disillusionment and on the way to a dentist appointment in Louisville, Kentucky. He was on the corner of Walnut and 4th Street when he was overcome with a new awareness. He wrote, "Yesterday, in Louisville, at the corner of 4th and Walnut, I was suddenly overwhelmed with the realization that I loved all these people, that they were mine and I theirs, that we could not be alien to one another even though we were total strangers. It was like waking from a dream of separateness, of spurious self-isolation in a special world, the world of renunciation and supposed holiness. The whole illusion of a separate holy existence is a dream. Not that I question the reality of my vocation, or of my monastic life: but the conception of "separation from the world" that we have in the monastery too easily presents itself as a complete illusion. I have the immense joy of being man, a member of a race in which God Himself became incarnate. As if the sorrows and stupidities of the human condition could overwhelm me, now I realize what we all are. And if only everybody could realize this! But it cannot be explained. There is no way of telling people that they are all walking around shining like the sun." Merton went on to be a voice of peace and social justice. His life and work were never the same. Countless people were and are influenced by his transformation.
There are many other similar stories. A common thread seems to be that a person must be in a position in which there is a desperate need to listen. Karl Menninger describes this listening as a force that creates us, unfolds us and expands us. The process is difficult. We are always ready to respond. Always ready to give advice. Always ready to talk. The idea of being quiet is foreign to us. But this is, indeed, what it takes to be a vessel for a new awakening. Active listening and reflection are a discipline that can be developed or it can be thrust upon us as it was for Bill Wilson and Thomas Merton.
We must listen for our new awakening, our personal epiphany. How can I become a quiet listener?
